Break the Chains

Not many people who know me are aware that my little brother is an addict. Most know that he's gotten into trouble and loves to party, but I don't think anyone would automatically jump to the conclusion that he's an addict. I think there is a stigma associated with that word and no one ever thinks that their loved one or someone they know could ever be an addict. We associate that word with the dark alley in the bad part of town or the homeless person yelling gibberish on the side of the road, maybe some think that only gangsters and prostitutes could be addicts, but from what I've seen and encountered with my little brother, it's the neighbor next door, it's the successful business owner, it's the single soccer mom, it's the high school kid who had a full ride scholarship to college...addiction doesn't care who you are or what you look like, it sneaks in and destroys you from the inside out. Addiction robs you of having a good life, it robs you of having friends and family that truly love and support you, it robs you of having self respect, love and dignity. Meanwhile, those who know and love you have no idea what's going on until it's too late. I thank God that He has kept my brother and brought him through some really scary times...I am so thankful that he's still alive!

My brother called out for help 17 days ago! He made the decision to go into rehab and finally was able to get on the wait list for a place close to my house. He's been staying with me so he has a safe haven to be, a place away from his friends who he parties with, until a bed opens up at the facility he's going to. There are good days and then there are BAD days and it has been a struggle for him, and for me. I don't know what it's like to be an addict, so there are times that I say the wrong thing or get upset about his attitude towards me. But he doesn't know what it's like to be the family member trying to help the addict they love. This is totally new territory for me and I'm doing my best, but some days I feel like it's too much to deal with and I get overwhelmed. The first night he told me he was done, that he was going to get his things and go back to his friends, I lost it! I cried for an hour straight because I knew if he left, they'd suck him right back into drugs. But we prayed hard that night and he chose to stay. Then 2 days later he tells me that he wants to leave and go get high, we got into a huge argument and I gave him 2 choices: you stay sober and you can continue staying with me or you go satisfy this craving and you can't stay here anymore. He was furious with me and he didn't talk to me for almost 24 hours, but you know what? He stayed! I know that addiction is a disease and it's a battle of the mind, but it also stems from childhood issues; the hurt and rejection he endured, the areas where he wasn't taught how to deal with real life by his parents, feeling abandoned by his dad who wasn't always around...all those things feed into the "why" of his addiction. It's not going to be easy for him to have to relearn life without drugs, he's going to have to face his past and come to terms with it, so he can make better decisions today that don't involve running to drugs like he used to do.

I don't know if this will be his first and only journey through rehab or if he'll end up there again down the road, but what I do know is that prayer is powerful and I will continue to love and support my brother through prayer. I want to see him happy, healthy and successful in life, so my prayer for him is that he continues down this path of sobriety and will choose happy, healthy and successful over the darkness and emptiness that is addiction. God has the power to break every chain!

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